NOT JUST CONVERSATION.
My favorite definition of dialogue is this: What you wanted to say at the time but it didn’t occur to
you until hours later. While dialogue is most useful and extremely important to screenwriting, you
should be wary of how much you use it to tell your story.
Characters don’t talk about the story; they are a part of the story. So, much more than dialogue, the events of your story should tell it.
If you ever took the time to listen to people talking, you’ll quickly find that it’s mostly jumbled
phrases that depend almost totally on the context of the conversation and the situation in
which people find themselves. It’s not always cogent or elegant. Real discussions tend to be
rambling discourses by people who all have personal agendas in the conversation and who
rarely listen to what others are saying. Instead, each person is thinking about what they’re going
to say next.
While this is valuable to observe as a screenwriter, you should avoid this type of authenticity in
your dialogue. In drama, each and every word of dialogue has to have purpose.
Dialogue Should Reveal Character Speech patterns are important. Certain people talk in certain ways. Doctors, lawyers, Indian chiefs all have a special vocabulary from which to express themselves. In addition, these characters have
grown up in a certain way in a certain environment with their own special set of experiences.
So, the way characters express themselves is most important to unfolding the story.
Here’s an example from Blood Ties that illustrate how a few simple lines of dialogue can reveal
characters’ personalities. Dr. Chestnut, Skeeter, and Tish are lost in the rain forest. The roar of a
huge jungle cat awakens them. Listen to what each character has to say at the sound of the cat:
TISH
What’s that?
SKEETER
It ain’t “Felix the Cat.”
CHESTNUT
Everybody stay calm.
These simple lines of dialogue reveal volumes about each character’s temperament. Now, here’s what
they say after an Efe hunter shoots the dangerous cat with a poison arrow and saves their lives:
SKEETER
Word! Robin’s in the “hood!”
TISH
Thank you, Jesus.
CHESTNUT
Get your stuff; we’re getting out of here.
In these few words of dialogue, you get the sense that Tish is tentative, Skeeter is brash, and
Chestnut is paternal by nature.
To help you understand how to better reveal character through the use of dialogue, it’s helpful to
use Sigmund Freud’s psychological model called Transactional Analysis. This theory is based on his
concept of ego, id, and super ego and that when people talk to one another, they are “transacting”
from a certain viewpoint. There are three viewpoints:
- Parent
- Adult
- Child
From this perspective, you can write stronger dialogue if you—as the writer—understand where
each character is coming from in a scene. For example, when a person speaks as a parent, he or
she is trying to control another character. By contrast, if a character speaks as a child, then he or
she is being controlled by another character. If both characters are being adult about a problem,
then they’re on even ground in the scene. So you can see, by varying the attitudes of your characters
in a single scene you can make the scene more interesting while developing each character. The
use of these techniques can also create reversals in a scene—or story—as characters shift from
one attitude to another.
In the film Sling Blade, Karl is childlike while his new friend—a kid—is adultlike; as the story
progresses, Karl and the kid trade attitudes. This growth between the two characters is most obvious
in the way they talk—transact—with each other over the course of the story.
You can also better control how you develop your characters through dialogue by taking into
consideration a simple communication model called the triad. It is a variation of Berlo’s
Communication Model that is a way of analyzing the way people talk to one another from three
elements: sender, message, and receiver. For example, Joe is on one point of the triad. Sam is on another. And a hamburger is the third point of the triad. Joe likes hamburgers from a certain fast-food restaurant. Sam likes another fast-food restaurant. What is the conversation going to be like if these two are trying to decide on where to go for lunch? It’s likely the discussion will be lively. This is a simple example, but the theory of it can help you to write more truthful scenes.
Dialogue Should Reveal Emotion
This is obvious. Dialogue can carry with it anger, sadness, joy, disappointment—any type of feeling.
The key is really how each character would express such emotion. For example, if one character
shouts all the time, how are we to know when he’s really angry? Some characters may tell funny
jokes when they’re really scared to death! Again, it all comes down to specific characters and their
mode of operation.
One very clever technique used in this category is to use a clever word or phrase in dialogue as a
mnemonic device to create an emotional reaction from the audience. This takes you beyond the
obvious use of emotions in dialogue. The mnemonic word or phrase starts out being used with a
negative connotation to a positive one. It is used twice, sometimes three times. If used three times,
the second use is neutral or transitional in the meaning. For example, in the film Ghost, the wife
tells the husband that she loves him but the husband replies “ditto.” This really ticks off the wife
since her husband can’t or won’t say he loves her. He simply can’t help himself emotionally. This is
a very negative connotation for the word. The husband dies. As a ghost, he uses “ditto” because he
knows it ticks her off. The word takes on a neutral or transitional meaning here to prove her dead
husband is there, not to show he loves her. Then by the end of the film, it’s the wife who uses
“ditto” to tell her dead husband she loves him.
There are other examples:
“My momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re
gonna get,” from Forrest Gump.
“Here’s looking at you, kid,” from Casablanca.
“Be careful among the English,” from Witness.
“You complete me,” from Jerry Maguire.
Dialogue Should Advance the Plot
Voice-over narration is the most common dialogue technique used to advance plot. Since dialogue
is not real conversation, you should be careful not to put a news report in a character’s mouth unless
he or she is, in fact, a news reporter in the story. There will be times when the characters need to
talk about what’s going on in their lives (thus the story) and sometimes this is unavoidable. When
you find yourself faced with this, try to be clever by using humor or strong emotion.
But here’s a not-so-obvious example of plot advancement through dialogue in Blood Ties:
When Pee Wee’s infected cut makes him extremely ill, Chestnut knows he must do something
about it:
CHESTNUT
This has gone too far.
Chestnut confronts Zantu. SUBTITLES:
CHESTNUT (CONT’D)
(native tongue)
Zantu, the boy is very sick. You must give
me a guide to Stanleyville.
ZANTU
(sees he means it)
Very well…
Chestnut finds Skeeter in the village…
CHESTNUT
I’m going to Stanleyville. I want you to keep
an eye on Tish.
SKEETER
Nah, man, I’m coming with you.
CHESTNUT
No, stay here.
SKEETER
Come on, “G” let me hang with you. We could
do a little male bonding thing…you know, like
in the movies…
OFF Chestnut’s amusement…
Of course, Chestnut couldn’t say no considering Skeeter’s convincing way of asking Chestnut to
take him on the trek to procure medicine for Pee Wee.
Dialogue Should Create Atmosphere
This short run of dialogue from Blood Ties creates a sense that we’re in a jungle village:
SUBTITLES:
KENYATTA
(in native tongue)
Zantu, for your generosity, I will pay you
very well.
ZANTU
(in native tongue)
I fear you bring bad luck to my village.
Kenyatta is momentarily vexed.
KENYATTA
(in native tongue)
Zantu, we don’t bring your village bad luck.
ZANTU
(in native tongue)
I saw it in my sleep. You must take the
Children away now.
KENYATTA
(in native tongue)
We have come a long way…
Zantu and Kenyatta stare at each other…
ZANTU
(in native tongue)
When the sun appears again, you’ll leave my
village.
OFF Zantu’s determination…
Also, notice that I’ve given the dialogue a certain rhythm to give the reader a sense that the
characters are using another language.
Dialogue Should Reveal Conflict
Here’s a scene from Blood Ties between the lawyer hired by Chestnut and Skeeter’s mother. This
short scene and its dialogue reveal much about the conflicts to come in the story as well as how
Skeeter grew up:
INT. LIVING ROOM – BANK’S UNIT – DAY
Somber. Worn-out furniture. An old television, new VCR and lots of
homemade tapes sit on a room divider that splits the living room from
the small dingy kitchen.
MRS. BANKS
What has he done now? He supposed to be in
camp. I sent him up there to get him off the
street—away from those thugs he calls his
“homeboys.”
(to the heavens)
God knows I’m trying.
Surprise sweeps Denton’s expression.
DENTON
Mrs. Banks, don’t you know your son is
missing?
MRS. BANKS
What do you mean he’s missing?
DENTON
Haven’t the police contacted you?
MRS. BANKS
I ain’t talked to no police. Phone’s
been cut off. I work two jobs. Mister,
you lucky you caught me home.
OFF Denton’s helpless reaction…
Dialogue Should Establish Relationships
Here’s another example from Blood Ties that helps to establish early on in Act Two how Tish,
Skeeter, and Pee Wee are going to relate among themselves as the story unfolds:
Then Skeeter and Pee Wee SEE the BARE-BREASTED EFE WOMEN, all under
five feet and dressed in knee-length cloths wrapped tightly around
their waists. Skeeter’s fear subsides as he elbows Pee Wee:
SKEETER
What time is it?
The hip-hop expression is lost on Pee Wee. He looks at his Boy Scout
watch:
PEE WEE
Pacific Daylight Savings Time…it’s
Eight o’clock.
SKEETER
Nah, man, I mean look at those hotties.
Now them some fruit I can deal with.
Tish playfully shoves Skeeter:
TISH
Don’t show your ignorance.
Dialogue Should Comment on Action
The following run of dialogue from Blood Ties gives the reader a sense of what’s going on in the
scene and in the story:
INT. YAWL – CONGO RIVER – AFRICA – DAY
Alone, the Lese Tribesman lounges on the front of the boat, stares
out at the passing jungle.
Pee Wee, Skeeter and Tish, in the rear of the boat, are soaking in
their own sweat.
Tish and Skeeter have shed most of their stylish hip-hop outfits,
while Pee Wee has rolled up the pant legs and sleeves of his colorful
pajamas—picks at the BLOODY SCAB on his wounded arm:
TISH
Ugh, stop that! That’s so nasty.
Cover it up!
Skeeter stares ahead steadily, ignores Tish’s girlish
behavior…there’s something on his mind.
SKEETER
There’s only one of him and three
of us. We could bum rush ‘em, hook
him up, no problem.
TISH
I’m not “hooking up” anybody.
The Lese Tribesman stares ahead sternly…
TISH
(continuing)
You think he’s a real African?
PEE WEE
I think he’s a cannibal.
SKEETER
Shut up, fool. Ain’t no such thing as
no cannibal. They make that crap up
for the movies.
TISH
Haven’t you ever watched National
Geographic?
SKEETER
Nobody asked you nothing.
Skeeter gives Pee Wee a mischievous look, grins.
SKEETER
(continuing)
Man, I been meaning to tell you:
that is one “phat” outfit you
sportin’. Nike or Reebok?
